Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Vegas back on !

A KickASS coworker was able to get me a gig in Vegas with a customer. It's on a Wednesday, so of course I'll have to leave first thing Tuesday morning to get there in time for the meeting on Wednesday, and I better stay over Thursday and Friday in case they have extra tough questions :-) .... thanks Mary !

Subject change .... If you know me at all, you know that I like witty comedy, especially shocking one liners. So I'm playing poker at the usual place, and we've been joking it up quite a bit and it was getting a little raunchy. At the game they have a masseuse who provides services at something like a $1 a minute.

She's giving this guy a massage and he's complaining about how his back is hurting from playing all this poker :

- "Man my shoulders are all hunched over from this game"
- "Yeah... I can feel the tension. You really need to get this worked out"

- "Is there something I can do to get my shoulders back in line ?"
- "Oh yes, there's plenty of exercises, stretching, you need to do so and so ... doctors have shown that you can strectch this muscle and get it back in line ..."

She goes on for a few more minutes, and I can't help but throw my two cents in :

- "Oh yeah, I was reading about that on the internet, they were also talked about something else that helps really well ... pause for effect ... ANAL !"

I love the one line shockers. Everybody has to be in a somewhat serious mood and you gotta just throw that grenade out there for it to be effective. Reminds me of my favorite joke of the moment :

I just bought a new car stereo... When you shout out "Jazz", it plays Jazz music. When you shout out "Rock", it plays rock music. Some kids ran in front of my car, and I shouted "fucking kids!", and it played Michael Jackson.

LMAO ... this works best when the discussion is about cars or stereos or MP3 players and they think you are serious about the voice activated stereo.

I LOVE comedy !