Friday, May 13, 2005

Bankroll ? What's it look like ?

The Vegas trip is right around the corner. I'm a Virgo, so I needed to make sure I'd be able to get the bankroll through security at the airport. I mean, I've written a lot of big checks, but I don't typically walk around with rolled up hundred dollar bills.

So I stopped at the bank today, just to see how "big" this bankroll would be. Would it fit in my pocket ? If it did, would it bulge out and cause suspicion by security ? I mean what kind of people walk around with rolled up hundreds in their pants ?

I walk up to the teller. I've got my withdrawl slip in hand. I've been flexing my hands and fingers all morning. I've got to be limber and prepared. I don't want to stretch my metacarpals and phalanges. My god!, those are the hands I have to hold the cards with. How ironic would it be to injure myself while trying to get my hands around the bankroll.

The teller says, "I'll have to go to another drawer. I don't have that much cash here." I think, "ohhh goodness... will my PT Cruiser be able to hold all this cash ?" He returns and begins to count the cash. He hands me the envelope. I remove it and make it into a real "bankroll". It looks like this :

Impressed ?? .... yeah, me neither. I was expecting something a little larger. I thought about asking for $20's or $1's. I'll save that for a day when I have more time.

I went bank to the teller. Told him I'd like to deposit the money back into my account. It will be safer there. I wouldn't want to lose it in the crack of the sofa cushion, it's so small, you know.

Well, when I come back with $10,000 that will be a sight ! I mean, that bankroll will be at least, well maybe .... about how much bigger ? Is it related to the square of the circumference of the cirle multiplied by pi ? Not a bit of damn good my mathematics minor is doing me now. I can't even calculate the size of my "bankroll" !


Anonymous said...

err..size of your 'bankroll'.. is that e euphamism? Thanks, now I really do have small mans complex, since my 'bankroll' is only 5 100's and easily rolls up and fits inside a Bic Pen and I can shoot it out like a spit wad!